Musings on a Rainy Tuesday

Last month's lack of inspiration is threatening to creep in to this month.  This shall not come to pass!


Whilst I think of new ways to motivate myself and some really late New Year's Resolutions, I offer you some musings from my cerebral cortex, my brain box, my dream spa, my idea factory, my...  Well, you get the idea.  Here's some stuff that I have been pondering on this rainy day in the UK.


Currently humming:- 'Chim Chiminey' from the Mary Poppins' soundtrack.  This has no doubt been brought on by my sensible refusal to purchase said movie in Tescos this afternoon.  It was £10 and I thought to myself, 'I bet it will be cheaper online' and 'I don't really need it now', whilst deep inside my subconcious my inner-child was having a tantrum of epic proportions. 


"Buy it!  Buy it!"  She screamed.  "If you don't buy it now you will never buy it and we will forever be robbed of another Disney treasure!"  Alas, her screams and threats fell upon mostly deaf ears and I managed to resist the urge to pop a copy of the dvd in to my basket.  Hence, that inner beast of mine is now tormenting me with song. 


Speaking of 'Mary Poppins', did anyone else have a strange crush on Dick Van Dyke in that film?  Or was it just me?  I'm not entirely sure what was so appealing about him.  It may have been his singing, his dancing, his rubbery face or his absolutely deplorable Cockney accent.  Or it may have been all of these things. 


Whatever the cause, there is something extremely watchable about Dick Van Dyke.  I rediscovered him once more in my teenage years whilst wiling away the hours in the university common room, watching Diagnosis Murder in my pyjamas, when I should have been at a lecture.  He occupies a special room in my heart, the door to which is marked, 'Happy Childhood Memories' and has a drawing of a rainbow and a smiley face next to it.


Things that have annoyed me today:-  Getting asked for I.D. in Tesco for the umpteenth time this year. 


Okay, so at first it was flattering.  What 27 year old woman wouldn't want to be asked for I.D?  It made me feel all warm and fuzzy and most importantly, it made me feel YOUNG.  Unfortunately, these days, it is a constant, irksome irritant! 


The check-out assistants seem to find it supremely odd and rather suspicious that I do not possess any form of picture I.D.  They are baffled beyond belief when I tell them that I don't drive and I don't possess a credit card.  Deal with it people!  Not everyone my age is emotionally mature enough to have these things!  Not everyone can afford driving lessons or a car.  Indeed, not eveyone has the financial means to keep a car running in this day and age. 


So, back off!  If you don't think I'm old enough, just count the laughter lines around my eyes.  If that fails to satisfy your curiosity, might I suggest that you cut me open like a tree and count my rings?  No?  I rather thought not.  But there is no way in hell I am leaving here without my Marlboro Lights and the bottle of Bells whiskey you see in this basket (medicinal purposes only, honest)! 


It's not my fault that every fourteen year old looks like a twenty five year old nowadays.  That's just evolution for you......  Helped along by excessive amounts of make-up, ridiculous heels and so-called role models that encourage them to look like stick insects and plastic dolls.


These are but two of the many thoughts that have been sprinting through my synapses today.


And......  I'm spent.

Hello 2010!

It seems very strange that we have entered 2010.  I thought we would have flying cars by now or at least a hoverboard or two.  Ho hum.  Christmas was a delightfully boring affair.  I watched Doctor Who and cried like a baby when he regenerated.  Nobody can fill a stripy mod-esque suit quite like David Tennant can. 


I also watched three different versions of 'The Hound of the Baskervilles'.  My favourite version by far has always been the Peter Cushing/Christopher Lee version.  There's nothing quite like the stars of Hammer Horror running around on a moor through lashes of dry ice to put a smile on your face.  Or perhaps it's just me. 


I ate my weight in Cadbury's Roses, Marks and Sparks nibbles and of course, turkey.  This is both right and proper and entirely the correct way to spend Christmas.  I wouldn't be at all surprised if there is actually a law about it somewhere. 


The highlight of my Christmas was my best friends getting engaged.  To each other, obviously.  If they had gotten engaged to other people that would have just been stupid.  When the lovely Boo showed me her diamond ring, I ooohed and ahhhed and got quite excited myself!  Then I asked her if it was cubic zirconia.  The room went very quiet and then she looked at me with the most incredulous and slightly insulted expression on her face.  I immediately knew that I had said something wrong.  I just had this feeling.


"No, Sophie," said she, "it's a diamond."


"Oh," said I, "isn't cubic zirconia a type of diamond?"  Well, as it turns out, apparently not. 


How was I to know?  I'm just not that type of girl, never have been.  I don't know the first thing about jewelery or fashion or.... anything remotely girly.  I hardly ever wear skirts or dresses.  I hate the colour pink.  In fact I'm so ungirly that I am sat here struggling to think of things that are girly!  I've always been more of a tomboy really.  Except I never climbed trees and I've always hated sports.


Anyway, where was I?  Ah yes, 2010.  You know what they say of course?  New Year, new start and all that?  Well, I'm delighted to announce that I have already broken every single one of my resolutions!  They were varied and many and have all fallen by the wayside.  Yet another tradition that I have successfully upheld! 


Seriously though, I don't really intend to give any of this year's resolutions a proper go until January 15th.  I think it only fair that you should get at least two or three weeks grace period after making them just to get used to the idea of changing your life and abstaining from many of the unhealthy things that you enjoy doing.  At least this is what I tell myself at night when I find myself looking back at how many calories I have consumed, cigarettes I have smoked and various other unhealthy, unproductive guff that I have waffled about in my diary during the course of the day.


Actually, wait a second.  Hold on a dang - tooting minute there!  I HAVE KEPT A RESOLUTION AFTER ALL!  The one I made about keeping a diary!  Hooray!  Although technically, I didn't actually start writing in it until 4th January - mostly due to the fact that I had forgotten that I had purchased it.  But you can't really hold that against me.  My body and I were still in a post-Christmas, post-New Year, overindulgent, toxic mess before then!  Therefore, anything I would have written down would probably have come out as gibberish anyway and would not have been the slightest bit self-motivating or understandable at all.  So there!


From Friday onwards I will be recommiting myself to the rest of my New Year resolutions.  It will most probably be hard and arduous and a teensy bit dull but I am determined to adhere to my own wishes.  Of course I shall be putting them all on this blog.  Probably in some kind of list form and probably at some point this week. 


Until then, I'm just going to kick back a little, finish this packet of chocolate buttons, step outside and smoke a little cigarette, log into Facebook and check out Farmville, update my new Twitter account and log into MSN for a little bit of chit chat. 


If procrastination was an art form, I'd have won the Turner Prize by now.

A Fresh Outlook

I find myself with a spring in my step today. The sun is shining, the winter air is crisp and fresh and everything seems that much brighter. Maybe it is because I have gotten that most difficult task on my Daily To Do List out of the way. Whatever the reason I feel fresh and frisky and full of positivity!


I'm currently re-reading 'The Witching Hour' by Anne Rice. It has to be one of my all time favourite novels. Rice's prose is so lush and vibrant. The minute I start reading anything that she has written I am instantly transported to a gorgeous, seductive, epic tale filled with old world charm and grace, not to mention a smattering of the supernatural. The first adult novel I ever read was "Interview with a Vampire". I found a battered copy in a charity shop when I was nine or ten. I've been mesmerised by her books ever since. They always put me in a fine mood!


Now, to other things....


Today will be mostly spent working on my goals for 2010. I've already got the first one all sorted out:- update this blog more often! Also appearing on my goals list will be the annual Stop Smoking Goal and the Get Fit Goal both of which I have high hopes of actually accomplishing this year!


The most important things that will appear on the list will undoubtedly be writing goals of one kind or another. I'm quite looking forward to planning all of the projects that I want to complete in 2010. I'm going to have an entirely fresh start and not ponder over all of the FAILS that have piled up this year. I'm just going to shed this year like a used up snake skin and go skipping merrily into a bright and shiny new regime.

Epic Fail!

I am disastrously behind with my word count and I'm not going to make it up in time. Therefore, I quit nanowrimo. I'm just not ready yet. I haven't got the dedication or the inspiration necessary to complete the project. Also, I'm not used to working to a deadline.


Big *Sigh*.


Never mind. There is always next year!


I'm going to work on some new projects and set myself some new goals. Maybe if I practice enough before next year, I will actually be able to finish on time.


I'm feeling a bit low at the moment, like everything is getting on top of me. It's almost like I have no control over my own life! Hopefully I will be able to shake off this funk before Christmas. However, the lack of cash readily available at my fingertips is threatening to encroach on any approaching yuletide cheer.


Gosh, I'm just a big ball of sunshine today!

NaNoWriMo:- Week Three Blues

I am really quite behind with my word count now. I'm not taking this project seriously enough. I am also having doubts about whether my writing is any good at all or if I really want to be an author. Lately, when I write, its a little bit like pulling teeth; slow and tedious and painful. I'm just suffering from a supreme lack of inspiration and quite possibly, a lack of self confidence. This is total sucksville.


I feel as though no matter how hard I try or how good my intentions I don't seem to get anywhere. Maybe its just me or maybe its the time of year. I've had a rough time these past few months so maybe that is taking a tole too.


Whatever! I'm still going to carry on slogging up that hill and cranking out the words as they come to me. I'm not sure that I am going to finish on time though and I'm not sure that my stories are any good at all.


If I had a harmonica I'd be trying to play the blues on it right about now.

Happy Days Are Here Again!

I have kicked some serious word count butt today! Hallelujah! Blood Red Tales is now coming along swimmingly. I am still quite behind but I reckon that if I can crank out a minimum of two thousand (look at me writing out the numbers to up the word count! Heheh!) words per day than I shall have victory! Plus, I will also be left holding a shiny new first draft! Yippee!


I must admit that I was having some serious doubts about whether or not I was going to finish Nano this year but now that I have re-embraced my original idea, all seems to be temporarily well. Also, I had serious words with myself about giving up on something that I've wanted to do for years just because I could not be bothered to put a little extra effort in. I kicked my own ass and it was totally worth it. I wrote over two thousand words today and I am well pleased at having achieved something for myself.


How's everyone else doing?


Here's a lovely treat for one and all:-





Oh Eric! Season Three of True Blood seems very far away :(

Oh dear!

I can't believe that I've neglected this blog for 12 days. Profuse apologies to all who have decided to follow it. I've been a bit low for the last couple of weeks and am only now getting back into the swing of things. Nano isn't going very well. I've lost my mojo!


I really shouldn't have junked my short story collection idea. I've started writing a book and have gotten all hung up on the plot. My inner editor really dosen't like it when I don't quite know where the story is going. I'm going to try and slog on with it but I think the short stories are going to be resurrected this weekend.


I think the problem with trying to write a whole novel is that I find myself becoming too self critical and I somehow lose the 'fun' element of writing. I'm just not quite ready yet. Also, I just haven't been taking this whole project seriously enough. That is all going to change. Starting NOW! I'm going to come up with some goals for myself to aim for and some rules to stick to for November.


I'm not giving up. I'm going to get over this silly little hurdle and make myself proud of well, myself really. It's been a tough year and I deserve to feel like I've done something that is just for me.


I'm rambling now. Time to go and kick some word count ass!